Flaws

There is no loftier goal in any endeavor than striving for perfection. But can any human being ever achieve perfection? I don’t know. That is a tough question for me to answer. My mind is ultimately drawn to the upper echelons of human performance; the elite of the elite in whatever task or skill one may undertake. Does a sprinter beat their record time every time they run? No. Does a sharpshooter hit every target where intended? Not likely. I’ve seen Tiger Woods miss putts. I’ve heard virtuosic musicians miss notes.

Have I ever seen a perfectly built scale model? Nope. I’ve seen some seriously impressive ones, but if you look hard enough, you’re going to find flaws. And that’s ok.

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IPMS is Bullshit

Who could forget the great “Basic Modeling Skill” wars of…err…last week? Well, I’m sure you most have; because you have lives. Fortunately, for me, I don’t. So I am here to remind you. No, not really, but let’s recap so the point of this thesis will be more clear:

Some people conflate the quality of a kit with one’s ability to overcome it’s challenges. Some people are critical of new tooled kits that are designed and fit poorly. These individuals are generally practicing some intellectual integrity by being able to say that while they may have built and even enjoyed a kit, it possessed some head scratching design moments.

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See Something? Say Something!

Recently I posted some work in progress photos. Shocking, I know. I have been a bit absent from the bench for some time. However, I have recently found a renewed interest in building. And even this was after another long lull that culminated in one completion last year in my Tamiya F-14. So, it’s been long break, finishing one build, starting a couple others, and another long break with me back at the bench resuming a build I started third end of last year.

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Basic Modeling Skills are for Basic Bitches

It’s that never tiresome topic of “basic modeling skills,” again. Recently, a colleague wrote an insightful blog post about the problem with slinging the term “basic modeling skills” around. If you’d like to read that you can click here to read “Not so Basic Modelling Skills.”

I do suggest you read it, it’s a solid argument on the topic, but the contents aren’t really important to continue with this post. What is important is that, like these topics always do, this one brought out the “basic modeling skills” virtue signaling Wanksocks; which is always fun. I mean the Wanksock’s mascot went as far as to call it “the stupidest thing” he’d ever read. Bold comments coming from someone who couldn’t get through thirteen minutes of a video without saying “um” and “uh” seven-hundred times. Besides, I’ve seen what this dude posts in Facebook groups. Surely he’s read some of his own comments at least occasionally?

The reaction has got me wondering, though. Why do these guys have such a fucking hardon for “basic modeling skills?” And what I’ve determined is they are basic bitches.

Now, don’t get me wrong, there are some basic things you need to know how to do to successfully build models. Like the article linked above, I would ask…what’s basic? But it doesn’t matter. The basic bitches will tell you. It’s filling and sanding. That’s it. That’s all it is. Filling with putty and fucking sanding. How do I know this is the only fucking thing they consider basic? Because it’s all they talk about when the go on their “basic modeling skills” rants.

You have to remember where this shit comes from. It all started when some modelers had the audacity to give honest reviews of kits.

Yeah, it’s the same ole conflation bullshit. Nothing new. But it always ends with a few of the basic bitches screaming about how you just “NeEd To LeArN tO uSe ThE pUtTy, DuFuS!”

So, what makes these basic skill worshiping bitches so basic? It’s all they have, and it’s basic. They’ve realized they completely lack the artistic capabilities to make a model interesting with painting and weathering, so they build their whole modeling identity on their ability to do the most mundane, simple tasks; the ones that require absolutely no talent. They are proud of their mastery of the basics because they have no advanced. They are basic bitches.

Just like Candie with an “ie” can’t fucking think for herself when she’s shopping for shoes and ends up at the Starbucks getting her basic coffee wearing her basic Uggs, these idiots can’t offer anything unique to the world of modeling. And they’ve apparently figured it out, so “basic modeling skills” has become their own little slave morality. That’s a wasted analogy because it requires a reading level higher than “Clifford the Big Red Dog.”

I’m going to go to bed and dream of all the awesome comments telling me to kill myself the basic bitches are going to leave from fake accounts. Stay advanced, homies.

An AMK Update They Don’t Want You To See

So, earlier this week we were mocking AMK for fucking up and wishing everyone a Happy Chinese New Year of the Monkey. Except that was 2016. And the next year of the dog is 2028; which coincidentally is when the F-14 is likely to be released.

The reason for mocking that post – the first anyone had seen from AMK since like September – is pretty clear. They are such a bucket of failure, it was just too easy a target. But let’s be real, it’s not a big deal. It’s just a humorous blunder that attracted negative attention because they’ve done so little to get any positive attention.

Then today I turned my phone on and switched over to my burner FB account to see what was going on in the world of the groups I’ve been banned from only to find that AMK have decided to make an announcement on their fan page. Now, they’ve politely asked that these images and the text from the post not be shared. So, I am going to fucking share them.

Behold.

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Again, no worries about the Chineses New Year thing. We’ve seen nothing but flashes of dumbassery from Martin Wilson, so his ineffectiveness at using Google is not surprising.

What we need to focus on is why you don’t want images and your post shared. Is it not you that sent your little butterball mouthpiece Martin out into the trenches of the internet modeling forums…what…five or six fucking years ago under the guise of wanting to do this kit right?

I was there, dawg, I saw it all from the earliest postings on ARC where you teased the forthcoming F-14 kit and how it was going to be the most superist awesomeist kit ever. You got hopes up, you over-promised. You made the tragic mistake in picking your PR man who I am guessing is responsible for most of the mishandling of the publicity of this kit release.

Then you got beat by Tamiya. That hurts, I know. And now Great Wall Hobby has promised one; we know they will deliver. But, I am guessing what hurts the most is that when you did put test plastic out there you had some embarrassing accuracy issues. And it was then where you felt the full force of the RED PEN BRIGADE and the vitriol they can spew.

That didn’t sit well did it? So now you don’t want consumer feedback all of a sudden. You don’t want anyone asking you when this kit you’ve vastly overpromised on is going to show it. Fuck, things are so bad that the biggest dickwad apologist on the planet is getting testy with you.

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Thankfully for you, like Frank says, no one listens to me. Not my page followers, not my hundreds of blog subscribers, not my 11k member Facebook group…no one. So it shouldn’t cause you too much pain for me to post these pictures you don’t want posted.

Here we go!

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Scale Modelings Greatest Disappointment: Hobby Boss’ 1/32 B-24

What a time to be alive as a scale modeler; at least that’s the perception. This is especially true if you like to build in the manscale and have an affinity for heavy bombers it seems. We all knew HK’s Lancaster kit was going to drop (after they already kicked off the market demand with their B-17s). But it was a real shock when Wingnut Wings came out of left field and announced their own Lancaster kit which looks to be destined to take the mantle of greatest injection molded kit ever.

The Hobby Boss B-24 hasn’t been as much of a surprise. The TrumpyBoss tag team has kind of been teasing this one for years (along with some other high demand 32nd projects). It has actually become kind of an inside joke in the industry – much like AMK’s failure to release their F-14 – but not nearly as fervent simple because TrumpyBoss doesn’t toot their own horn like AMK has.

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Aftermarket is a Mental Disorder

Let me just begin by straight out saying, no, I don’t think you have a mental disorder for using aftermarket. Inevitably someone is going to read the title and get all incensed before reading the post, if they ever read it, so I thought I’d clear that up.

However, I do think in my case there’s some deeply clinical affliction in my own personal addiction to aftermarket. Over the past couple of days I’ve been thinking a lot about this; much of it spurred by my recent purchase of a resin set that cost me 150% of what the kit it is meant for did. And the aftermarket didn’t even stop with that set!

The Zactomodels Mig-29 upgrade set for the 1/32 Trumpeter kit is a lovely product. If you’re interested in a review, I made a video you can find here. But despite the loveliness of the resin, and the admitted upgrade the pieces are to the kit, is it going to make the build more enjoyable?

And thats my problem. Of late most aftermarket that’s gone beyond just simple seats and wheels has been more of a drain on my builds than a stimulating factor. I said in my Zacto review linked above that AM for me is a means to more, or better, detail. That is always my biggest motivator in acquiring these pieces. The Zacto set fits that requirement with most of it’s pieces, but a couple (the nose in particular) is more of a correction for misshapen kit parts. Coincidentally, it also appears to be the piece thats going to cause the most work. No extra level of detail. Just more work for more accuracy; something I don’t even care about.

So why am I going to put myself through the extra work? Some abnormal psychology created in adolescence probably. I remember the first time I realized aftermarket was a thing. After navigating my tween and teen building years surviving off Kmart and Toys R Us purchased kits, I found myself in a hobby store that stocked resin and photoetch. My desire for that resin Verlinden set for a Hasegawa Bf-109 was likely driven by a desire for modeling elitism (in my mind) as much as it was all the intricate detail that the kit had left out.

Who doesn’t fondly remember their first set of aftermarket parts?

I will just tell you, that didn’t end well. The kit was never finished. But that didn’t stop me from becoming obsessed with hoarding every little bit of resin or metal available for a kit even if it wasn’t always possible. From being a kid with limited financial means to a college student struggling with the first years of marriage and trying to survive, the reality was often trying to make craft acrylics work on Revell kits rather than amassing AM for high end kits. However, that stage of life has passed, and here we are.

Take a look at my last build. My Tamiya F-14 arrived with an Eduard Big Sin set and some resin seats from Quickboost. These parts made the kit more work than I intended for what was supposed to be a mojo building exercise. I had to take a belt sander to the QB seats so they wouldn’t sit too high, and the Eduard pit tricks you into thinking it fits. However. if you aim to close the canopy you’re left to learn that it spreads the fuselage enough to make that join ever so janky.

Yet I’m still amassing aftermarket.

Look, I feel when you’re in the manscale realm that certain aftermarket is mandatory. An injection molded ejection seat isn’t going to cut it. Wheels from a kit, especially when vinyl, just don’t live up to the scale requirements. If the Zacto set has taught me anything, it is probably that resin exhausts are equally mandatory.

But there needs to be a line, and with this Mig build, I think I have successfully drawn it. Full resin cockpits seem to be more trouble than they are worth. Ditto to wheel wells. My need to put some aftermarket into a kit is still there. There’s still this underlying psychosis that tricks me into thinking my models are less worthy of attention if they come straight from the box. And as long as there are no shrinks specializing in aftermarket response to intervention, I’m fucked.